June is men’s mental health awareness month and like clock work men are yet again still complaining during this month that their mental health is not taken seriously. The question remains: by who? Perhaps channeling the energy to actually speaking out about the mental health challenges that men face daily rather than expect whoever they are waiting for to raise awareness can be a start.
According to the National Institute of Mental Health, men are four times likely than women to commit suicide and yet are less diagnosed with mood disorders and anxiety. (https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/statistics/suicide)
The reason behind this could be that women seek help in larger numbers than men. Toxic masculinity denotes to what is culturally expected of men to behave which involves aggression, dominance and strength. In as much as strength is considered a virtue, so is vulnerability and unfortunately in an attempt to portray what is considered manliness, men do not seek help.
Like all cultural beliefs, toxic masculinity is taught from a young age. In sesotho, it is said “monna ke nku ha a lle” which means that a man is like a sheep and therefore should not cry. Boys grow up learning that it is a weakness to cry which then breeds unhealthy coping mechanisms such as violence and anger outbursts that not only affect them but their loved ones as well. Persuading men to suppress emotions does more harm than good.
For men’s mental health month, more than raising awareness using statistics on suicide rates among men more conversations should be had on how toxic masculinity is one of the leading factors to the declining mental health of men. Building vulnerable friend groups with those around them can also help eradicate the stigma towards men’s mental health which is still so rife.
Resilience is defined as the ability to bounce back from setbacks and one can not bounce back without falling down first. You can’t heal what you don’t confront and the first step to improving men’s mental health is to actually allow themselves to fall, be vulnerable, admit and accept that they are struggling mentally and only then can they be able to overcome their struggle.
It is high time that the online men’s conference actually takes place because only men have the power to ensure their mental wellbeing and to make sure that people are aware of men’s mental health awareness month. Starting a hashtag on Twitter speaking about men’s mental health and sharing mental health nuggets can be a positive start in the right direction.
Sometimes I just write 